Three men from Tamil Nadu are silently scripting stories of transformation, diverging from conventions this Navaratri season.
The festival of Navaratri is now changing the equations of a socio-cultural order. (Supplied)
Transformation need not always be a loud exercise. Sometimes, a silent but graceful revolution does the needful. It is this philosophy with which Ravisankar VM, Vignesh C, and Senthil Nathan are celebrating the nine-day festival of Navaratri. What has been a sacred domain of feminine energy and synonymous with womanhood for generations, the festival is now changing the equations of a socio-cultural order.
These men, among many others, are scripting stories of a new India that is diverging from conventions with respect and honour, breaking gender barriers, and fostering inclusivity.
Senthil, a Madurai-based entrepreneur, initiated his Golu tradition in 2020, as a creative response to the challenges posed by the lockdown. (Supplied)
For Ravisankar, this Navaratri was about fulfilling a lifelong dream — of having his own Golu. From the age of 10, Ravi would accompany his parents to the Poompuhar and Kuralagam exhibitions to select exquisite dolls and gift them to friends and family who keep Golus.
Reflecting on his debut Golu, the resident of Thiruvottiyur shares, “Curating the dolls for my Golu was an emotionally enriching experience. We have set up two Golus — one featuring traditional dolls and the other showcasing age-old vessels. Each vessel has been thoughtfully sourced from artisans across Tamil Nadu. It was a collaborative effort with my mother.”
Ravisankar has set up Golus — one featuring traditional dolls and the other showcasing age-old vessels. (Supplied)
Unlike Ravi, Senthil, a Madurai-based entrepreneur, initiated his Golu tradition in 2020, right amid the pandemic’s impact. For him, it was a creative response to the challenges posed by the lockdown. Life has only shown him positive changes since then, he shares.
“What began as a personal endeavour has now blossomed into a heartwarming family tradition. My two brothers have been so enthralled by the Golu fervour that they willingly request leave during Navratri to actively participate in the festivities,” he enthusiastically shares with South First.
“My mother, my chithi (aunt), and several other close relatives have cultivated deep emotional connections with the entire Golu experience. Their enthusiasm has encouraged other family members to start keeping Golu,” he adds.
The Golu experience offered by Senthil’s family primarily involves an engaging storytelling session, which has proven to be a captivating draw for children in his neighbourhood.
Senthil’s Golu experience has engaging storytelling sessions for children in his neighbourhood. (Supplied)
“Once, we set up a mehendi corner. Alongside girls, boys also got their names designed on their palms,” he says. Golu, he adds, represents an invaluable means to pass down our cultural legacy to the generations of the future.
“Beyond considerations of caste or gender, it’s the profound essence and spirit that truly matter and inspire. I take immense pleasure in witnessing an emerging community of men actively participating in this tradition,” Senthil enthuses.
Thousands of miles away in Sydney, the same sentiment resonates with Vignesh C, who has faithfully maintained a Golu tradition since 2014.
A native of Madurai, Vignesh shares his life with his partner, Andrea, who hails from Italy, and their two-and-a-half-year-old daughter, Meenakshi.
Golu is Vignesh’s way of celebrating the important women in his life. “I celebrate my mother, mother-in-law, and the surrogate mother of our daughter, who played a significant role in bringing Meenakshi into our world,” he adds.
The arrival of Meenakshi transformed Vignesh’s perspective and approach to Golu.
The arrival of Meenakshi transformed the cultural perspective of Golu for her gay parents, Vignesh and Andrea. (Supplied)
“Setting up a Golu before and after having a child are two entirely different experiences. It’s a ten-day commitment, and as my partner is not deeply connected with my cultural background, the responsibility of arranging and inviting guests falls on me,” he informs. Vignesh has actively been using his Instagram account dads.of.meenakshi, to amplify the voice of the LGBTQIA+ community and bring visibility to same-sex parents.
The gay parents have introduced Meenakshi to the rituals by sharing tales of little Krishna and Durga, gradually acquainting her with the rich traditions.
His roots in Madurai, a city brimming with temples and a vibrant Golu culture, have left an indelible mark on his identity.
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Recalling his childhood, he vividly remembers the mesmerising sight of Porthamarai Kulam at the Meenakshi Amman Temple, where every nook and corner would be adorned with dolls.
Today, when he arranges divine figurines and Pandya region dolls in his own Golu, he feels an intimate connection with those cherished memories.
“You will find Andal, Koodal Azhagar, deities from temples in Madurai, Uppiliappan, and more in my Golu. I enjoy narrating the sthala puranas of these gods to kids,” he adds.
The inspiration for Ravi’s Golu, featuring traditional vessels, was born out of his passion project called Paathira Kadai. Through this venture, he revives and sources age-old vessels from skilled artisans. He makes them available to those who share his appreciation for these treasures.
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The vessels showcased in Ravi’s Golu are a combination of his personal collection and precious gifts passed down from his grandmother. The Golu displays a variety of items including thooku, lunchboxes, coffee filters, sombu, choppu, chembadam, vaali, idli paathiram, and more, many of which are no longer in common use today.
Calling it his labour of love, Ravi narrates, “These vessels carry with them the names of those who once owned and cherished them. They evoke a sense of nostalgia and connection. Friends from the Chettinad belt have generously gifted me vessels, and some have contributed dolls as well,” he beams.
These men have found immense support and encouragement from their friends and families, motivating them to continue their efforts. Ravi’s followers on his other passion project, “Muraivaasal,” on Instagram, have expressed admiration for the photos of his Golu.
Besides visiting various Golus at temples, Ravi offers a virtual tour while inviting people to his Golu. “I have a day job. But, I’ve worked my timings around in a way that I’m able to juggle Golu and work. I view it as an opportunity to honour the incredible women in our lives. That’s how I choose to perceive it,” he notes.
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Similarly, Vignesh also believes that just as Navaratri provides a nurturing space for women, it’s equally essential to consider how men can actively participate in it. He recognises the significance of embracing both masculine and feminine aspects, aiming to strike a harmonious balance.
He acknowledges, “Navratri has deep-rooted connections with womanhood and is predominantly women-centric, leaving limited space for men. We must understand the importance of increasing male involvement, as it fosters greater understanding and appreciation of the feminine energy.”
Vignesh passionately underscores the importance of steering clear of unwarranted taboos that can unnecessarily burden our lives. He affirms that when it comes to Golu, there is no strict rulebook to follow.
He encourages everyone to break free from rigid expectations and stresses the importance of being gentle with oneself.
“Let’s be kind to ourselves,” he suggests.
“For instance, it’s perfectly alright if a doll accidentally breaks. There is nothing inauspicious about it. My partner and I mended a cherished Krishna doll, and it has become an integral part of our Golu. There’s no need to bow to peer pressure and overspend. Do what you can and what brings you joy,” he emphasises.
“To me, Golu is more than just a cultural ritual; it’s a meditative experience. I spend my evenings in the company of the deities, and it provides me solace,” he shares.
For these men, Golu is a meditative experience. (Supplied)
Keeping Golu has been a deeply transformative journey for Senthil. He calls it a sanctuary for self-reflection, gratitude counting, and engagement in meaningful activities.
“Each year, we add steps to the Golu. This aligns with the growth of each individual within our family,” he reflects. The evolving significance of Golu as illustrated through the experiences of these men, signifies a promising shift.
It transcends traditional boundaries and paves the way for a more inclusive and culturally vibrant future.
To follow their journey, visit Instagram @paathira_kadai @muraivaasal @dads.of.meenakshi
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